The Archives

Hipster Affectations: The Next Wave
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Posted in Lies and Entertainment on 12 October 2010
Stats: 27,345 views and 4 Comments

Forget pocket puppies and designer kittens. Some hipsters are already filling their houses with canaries trained to sing Decemberists tunes.

Halloween Safety Tips
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Posted in Lies and Entertainment on 8 October 2010
Stats: 5,603 views and 1 Comment

It’s okay to have fun as long as we play it safe. These safety tips will ensure that your Halloween is all treat and no tricks!

In My Day, The Web Was…
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Posted in Lies and Entertainment on 29 September 2010
Stats: 5,571 views and 1 Comment

In my day, the web was small. It wasn’t even a billion pages yet. You could surf the entire thing in under a hundred years. And it was a kinder, more homey place; you knew all your neighbors.

The Ultimate Sales Letter
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Posted in Lies and Entertainment on 24 September 2010
Stats: 4,946 views and 3 Comments

I have merged all the sales emails I have received in the last month into one super email which is guaranteed to sell your product. Use it wisely.

Tales of the Wallingford Beast, Part 1
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Posted in Lies and Entertainment on 17 September 2010
Stats: 28,028 views and 1 Comment

Here at Archie McPhee we’re used to strange things happening, but these events defy explanation. Something is out there.

Awesome Panda Facts!
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Posted in Lies and Entertainment on 10 September 2010
Stats: 11,555 views and 1 Comment

As part of our continuing effort to rid the internet of filthy lies, we present a few incredibly well-researched and absolutely true facts about the Giant Panda.

Excerpts from H.P. Lovecraft’s Yelp Page
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Posted in Lies and Entertainment on 27 August 2010
Stats: 8,964 views and 3 Comments

After awakening from a troubled sleep infected with visions of demonic abstractions pitched at odd angles against an impossible landscape of stark horror, my sweet tooth hit.

Suggested Product Improvements: The Ventriloquist’s Dummy
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Posted in Lies and Entertainment on 20 August 2010
Stats: 7,508 views and 7 Comments

Everyone wants to own a ventriloquist dummy, but how do we overcome the fear that it will come to life in the middle of the night and stab us to death?

A Modesty Proposal
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Posted in Lies and Entertainment on 13 August 2010
Stats: 3,770 views and 3 Comments

We believe that you shouldn’t have to be human to experience shame. Shame should be equally enjoyed and celebrated by all living things.

The Lost Films of Ginger Grant
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Posted in Lies and Entertainment on 9 August 2010
Stats: 8,235 views and 2 Comments

Each film portrays a stunning beauty of her day (1961’s Miss Hourglass — so named for having sand in all the right places!) at the height of her acting prowess.