Dressing as you for Halloween was intended as an homage, it was not meant to insult or anger you. It was just a rib. (By the way, did you see the McRib is back this week? Yum!)

The first attempt at a vampire story failed because the creature didn’t drink blood. Instead, he licked sweat off of sweaty, overweight men.

I am SO into Halloween, they call me…Mr. Halloween. I LOVE Halloween. Not like mama-child love. Not like puppy love. Not even like how you might love Ore-Ida Tater Tots, but loving love.

Don’t ask me if I get excited for Halloween. I spent pretty much every Halloween from birth through age 16 hiding in a cave.

Two chocolate-covered marshmallows, both of them shaped as pumpkins. Russell Stover and Peeps. One will be declared victorious, and the other will face internet scorn.

A tribute to the great horror movies of the 1980s, and a blog that evokes Ministry’s biggest disco hit. Also: Naval hospital hijinks.

I thought to myself, why is it less scary that a man in a costume is chasing them around with an axe than if it were a mummy or a floating revolutionary war soldier?

I began to feel a dragging in the book as Bella anguished over Edward. When was she actually going to realize that he was a vampire?

In honor of what may very well be our second-favorite holiday ever, the undead editors of this publication present these kreepy Halloween klassics from the Monkey Goggles vaults!

Halloween is a mix of traditions including the Catholic All Saints Day, the Celtic Samhain Day and the ancient French holiday Secretary’s Day.