Kobi Shaw 3 August 2009 Stories and Appreciations 859 views 3 Comments Print This Post  Email This Post

I have an odd fascination with talent shows. Whether they’re happening at county fairs, on cruise ships or in high school auditoriums, they draw me in. I’ll even watch beauty pageants (live or televised), but the only thing that truly interests me is the talent portion. Unfortunately, my husband does not share in this passion and I have to watch these talent competitions alone — although sometimes, he’ll overhear “American Idol “from the other room and ask, “Is that supposed to be good?”

I think my interest in talent shows is connected to what people choose to perform. I’m intrigued as to what they perceive as their strengths, the talent that best represents who they are.  For me, a talent show act doesn’t have to be “good” per se; it only needs to be interesting or creative. Someone has to put creativity and heart into their act, which can sometimes lead to odd combinations. To this day I can still vividly recall a pageant contestant interpreting “Amazing Grace” – on roller skates.

Several standout acts have been burned into my brain over the years. In my youth, I was mesmerized by a ballerina tap dancing (en pointe) to a medley of “You’re A Grand Old Flag” and “Yankee Doodle Dandy.” Then there was the middle school talent show where some guy got up on a box with fistfuls of leaves in his hands, put his arms straight out to his sides, and started slowly dropping leaves to the ground as he repeated the phrase, “I’m leaving…I’m leaving.” Then he left the stage for real.

I used to work on cruise ships and attended the passenger talent shows religiously. Week after week, some passenger or another would inevitably attempt to sing the Bette Midler standard “Wind Beneath My Wings.”  Interestingly, the singer always dedicated the song to one of their grandparents — not their mother or father, not their spouse or child. It was always “Pop-Pop” or their beloved “Grandma Meemaw.”  I was on the ship for five months and I do not think a week passed without this ritual occurring.

I do have a bee in my bonnet about people going for cheap laughs in talent competitions. The biggest offender is a man wearing a dress. I’m not talking about a sequin-drenched drag queen — they’ve put time into that creation! I’m talking about the hulking, hairy jock who wears a polka dot sun dress for his Senior Follies Showcase. Too easy. And besides, the opposite situation — a woman in a suit — never gets the same response.

Sometimes contestants endure brutal conditions. At one county fair, the stage for the talent show was butted up against the retaining wall for the demolition derby. Even worse, the fair board actually scheduled these two events to occur at the same time. Apparently a talent competition and a demolition derby do not have crossover appeal.

For me, it was a no-brainer:  I ignored the dusty racetrack with its gate fees and headed for the free show under the striped tent. Over a dozen acts — from preteens dancing inappropriately to a family of fiddlers — took the stage, fighting for the audience’s attention over the roar of speeding junker cars. Now that’s true American spirit.  I don’t recall who won that night, but does that really matter? They were all winners in my eyes.

I cannot write this piece without mentioning a little old white-haired lady I saw on a luxury cruise ship. She had on some patchwork style dress, a mop cap on her head, and bearfoot claw slippers. She danced uninhibitedly around the stage, lip-syncing to (of all songs) Aretha Franklin’s “Respect.”  Just think about that. Not only did she put this costume together, she actually made room in her suitcase to bring it all along on a seven-day cruise.  That’s how much she wanted to perform her piece for an audience. That’s dedication.

Talent runs deeper than the ability to just do something. It takes heart and creativity. It takes passion and time. But most importantly, it takes an appreciative audience member like me, looking for that diamond in the rough … which sometimes is very rough, indeed.

PHOTO BY SUNSHINECITY