News We Wish Were True: Thousands Flock to Batman’s Birthplace
WALLA WALLA, WA. — Thousands of people, some from as far away as Italy and France, have come to spontaneously stand in the pouring rain in front of the rustic log cabin where beloved TV actor Adam West was born.
The actor who starred as Batman on the 1966 “Batman” television show, and who now appears as himself on “Family Guy” and at various comic-book conventions and boat shows, was born William West Anderson in Walla Walla, Washington on September 19th, 1928, to parents Otto West Anderson and his wife Audrey.
Beginning last Thursday, the faithful began lining up outside the star’s former home, now an insurance office. Some have been loudly reading from the actor’s autobiography, “Back To The Batcave” while speaking in tongues. Others have been content to sing the “Batman” theme song at the top of their lungs.
Allen J. Callaci, an Economics professor from Southern California, said, “I can’t explain it; something called for me to be here. I was drawn here like a moth to the flame. It’s like another harmonic convergence.”
Todd McDougall, a TV news cameraman, impulsively threw off his expensive camera equipment onto the wet gravel driveway to stand with the faithful on the log cabin’s collapsed porch.
“You just feel safe and watched over here,” McDougall said.
Local bookkeeper Jennifer Orris complained, “Listen to that noise! If they were just quiet about it, I could sleep. But all the lit candles and ‘Da-da-da-da Batman!’ songs at three in the morning gets to be a bit much.”
Walla Walla Police Chief Clancy O’Hara says “The crime rate has never been lower. Last month, we caught three people stealing cable–not anymore! The night I stood in the crowd, I looked at the house and saw Mr. West, as big as life, in his blue mask and pointy ears.”
Exasperated Seattle parapsychologist Alison Nelson snapped, “Look, I’m gonna tell you what I told the news and all those crazy people in Walla Walla. They are not seeing Adam West or having visions of Adam West, because Adam West is alive and well.”
TV Land is sending out a team of monks to verify the miracle. Adam West, currently voicing Ace The Rooster in “Chicken Little 2: What Goes Up,” had no comment.